Skip to main content
Topic: got a snoring problem? cure here............................................. ...nsfw (Read 615 times) previous topic - next topic

got a snoring problem? cure here............................................. ...nsfw

A couple has a dog that snores. Annoyed because she can't sleep, the wife goes to the vet to see if he can help. The vet tells the woman to tie a ribbon around the dog's testicles and he will stop snoring.

"Yeah right!" she says.

A few minutes after going to bed, the dog begins snoring as usual. The wife tosses and turns, unable to sleep. Muttering to herself, she goes to the closet and grabs a piece of ribbon and ties it carefully around the dog's testicles. Sure enough, the dog stops snoring. The woman is amazed!... See More

Later that night, her husband returns home drunk from being out with his buddies. He climbs into bed, falls asleep, and begins snoring loudly. The woman thinks maybe the ribbon will work on him. So closet again, grabs a piece of ribbon, and ties it around her husband's testicles. Amazingly, it also works on him! The woman sleeps soundly.

He wakes from a drunken stupor and stumbles into the bathroom. As he stands in front of the toilet, he glances in the mirror and sees a blue ribbon attached to his privates. He is very confused, and as he walks back into the bedroom, he sees a red ribbon attached to his dog's testicles. He shakes his head and looks at the dog and says, "I don't know where we were or what we did, but, by God, we got first and second place!"
'98 Explorer 5.0
'20 Malibu (I know, Chevy, but, 35MPG. Let's go brandon, eh)

 

got a snoring problem? cure here............................................. ...nsfw

Reply #1
Haha, thats pretty good.  reminds me of the Drunken Scotsmen song.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=65hOhj94ZGE
1986 Mercury Cougar - 2.3T/T5 swap, TC brakes and suspension and rearend, 3" exhaust, 255 lph fuel pump, Stinger BOV, Gillis MBC @ 18 psi
2003 Chevy Suburban Z71 - Daily driver
2015 Chevy Volt - Wife's daily driver

got a snoring problem? cure here............................................. ...nsfw

Reply #2
Yes, I knew I'd heard a similar one about the Scotsman. That's a good one.

*edit*

And if any of you really have a snoring problem, try the Breathe Right Strips. No joke, they work like magic. I used them for a few months and I haven't snored since, and that was years ago. I don't know how, but they seem to have corrected the problem, and I don't have to use them at all anymore. Now, the only time I snore is if I had a reeealy late night and had half a dozen too many.