Here are mine
The first and most important rule of gun-running is, never get shot with your own merchandise.
Turn the right corner in Sin City, and you can find anything..
When it comes to reassuring a traumatized 19-year-old, I'm about as expert as a palsy victim doing brain surgery with a pipe wrench.
and one more from Lord Of war
Commonly known as AK-47 or Kalashnikov
It's the world's most popular assault rifle.
A weapon of fighters' love
An elegantly simple pound of algemation of forged steel and plywood
It doesn't break, jam or overheat.
It will shoot whether it is covered in mud or filled with sand
It's so easy. Even a child can use it.
And, they do. The Soviets put the gun on a coin.
Mozambique put it on their flag.
Since the end of the Cold War, the Kalashnikov has become
The Russian people's greatest export
After that comes vodka, caviar, suicidal novelists
One thing is for sure; no one was lining up to buy their cars
Pulp fiction
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa... stop right there. Eatin' a bitch out, and givin' a bitch a foot massage ain't even the same ****in' thing.
Vincent (http://"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000237/"): It's not. It's the same ballpark.
Jules (http://"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000168/"): Ain't no ****in' ballpark neither. Now look, maybe your method of massage differs from mine, but, you know, touchin' his wife's feet, and stickin' your tongue in her Holiest of Holies, ain't the same ****in' ballpark, it ain't the same league, it ain't even the same ****in' sport. Look, foot massages don't mean shiznit.
Vincent (http://"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000237/"): Have you ever given a foot massage?
Jules (http://"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000168/"): [scoffs] Don't be tellin' me about foot massages. I'm the foot ****in' master.
Vincent (http://"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000237/"): Given a lot of 'em?
Jules (http://"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000168/"): shiznit yeah. I got my technique down and everything, I don't be ticklin' or nothin'.
Vincent (http://"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000237/"): Would you give a guy a foot massage?
[Jules gives Vincent a long look, realizing he's been set up]
Jules (http://"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000168/"): **** you.
Vincent (http://"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000237/"): You give them a lot?
Jules (http://"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000168/"): **** you.
Vincent (http://"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000237/"): You know, I'm getting kinda tired. I could use a foot massage myself.
Jules (http://"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000168/"): Man, you best back off, I'm gittin' a little pissed here
A few good men
Col. Jessep (http://"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000197/"): You want answers?
Kaffee (http://"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000129/"): I think I'm entitled.
Col. Jessep (http://"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000197/"): You want answers?
Kaffee (http://"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000129/"): I want the truth.
Col. Jessep (http://"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000197/"): You can't handle the truth.
From Dazed and Confused
Wooderson: "Let me tell ya what The Melba Toast is packin' here alright. Got 4.11 posi track outback, 750 double pumper, Edelbrock intake, she's been bored over .30. 11:1 pop-up pistons, turbo-jet 390 horsepower. Were talking some F'in muscle."
Also from the same movie
Wooderson: "Hey I hope you brought your woodscrews...'cause I'm gonna blow your doors completely off!"
Another good one.
Wooderson: Yeah, well, listen. You ought to ditch the two geeks you're in the car with now and get in with us. But that's alright, we'll worry about that later. I will see you there. All right?
And finally.
Clint: I only came here to do two things, kick some ass and drink some beer.
[glances over his shoulder]
Clint: Looks like we're almost outta beer.
Dazed and Confused:
That's what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age.
The Fast and the Furious:
Ask any racer, any real racer. It doesn't matter if you win by an inch or a mile; winning's winning.
Army of Darkness:
Now listen up, you primitive screwheads. See this? This... is my boomstick! The 12-gauge double-barreled Remington. S-Mart's top of the line. You can find this in the sporting goods department. That's right, this sweet baby was made in Grand Rapids, Michigan. Retails for about $109.95. It's got a walnut stock, cobalt blue steel, and a hair trigger. That's right. Shop smart. Shop S-Mart. You *got* that?
waiting:
"shiznit, if this gonna be that kinda party, I'm gonna stick my dick in the mashed potatoes!"
Not that it's my Fav of all time, just my current favorite... just saw the movie last night.
fast and the furiousyour lucky you didnt blow the welds on your intake manifold.:bs: and then he ran from the cops and got away?? in a blown up car??:bs: :giggle:
I have one for stupidest quote!
Fast and the Furious:
You almost had me? You never had me - you never had your car... Granny shiftin' not double clutchin' like you should. You're lucky that hundred shot of NOS didn't blow the welds on the intake! You almost had me?
Not to take 84t-birds quote. But the part I like is the "Granny shiftin' not double clutchin' like you should". Does this not make sence to anyone else.
should be powershifting lol,, i found that movie very funny
that movie was full of stupid quotes. did anyone else cry when they wrecked the charger?
Brothers:
What we do in Life echoes in Eternity.... (Gladiator)
and another one from gladiator..
http://www.americanrhetoric.com/mp3clips/newmoviespeeches/moviespeechgladiator2.mp3
Here are a couple of more classics...
http://wavcentral.com/cgi-bin/log/log.cgi?id=3922&sound=/sounds/movies/days_thunder/dtrpm.mp3
http://wavcentral.com/cgi-bin/log/log.cgi?id=3921&sound=/sounds/movies/days_thunder/dtrub.mp3
Tyler Durden: Only after disaster can we be resurrected.
Tyler Durden: Man, I see in fight club the strongest and smartest men who've ever lived. I see all this potential, and I see squandering. God it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables; slaves with white collars. Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shiznit we don't need. We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War's a spiritual war... our Great Depression is our lives. We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off.
Tyler Durden: Its not until you lose everything that you are free to do anything
Christmas Story
Ralphie: (as narator: I could feel the christmas noose begining to tighten. Maybe what happend next was enevitable.)
Mom: Ralphie what do you want for Christmas?
Ralphie: (horrified I heard myself blurt it out.) I want an official Red Ryder carbine action 200 shot rangemodel air rifle!!!(ooouuh!!)
Mom: No, you'll shoot your eye out.:nono:
Ralphie: (Oh no it was the classic mother BB gun block. You'll shoot your eye out. That deadly phrase uttered many times before by hundreds of mothers was not surmountable by any means known to kid-dom.)
or
Tommy Boy
Fat guy in a lil' coat!:D
not from a movie but
homer simpson"shut up brain, or ill poke yo with a cue tip."
Dante Hicks: "Thirty-seven! My girlfriend's sucked thirty-seven dicks!"
Customer: "In a row?"
PANICS(Web Series)- They give us a machine gun capable of firing 300 rounds per minute, and expect us to fight off spirits? Hell I might as well stab it with a dinner ****.
What the hell is a dinner ****?
I cant choose. I like ones off of tv shows more. Aqua Teen Hunger Force and Robot Chicken
red vs blue (the halo movie)- you gave him cpr for a gunshot wound? you are a geinious.
disclaimer-i'm not wure i got it completely correct but you get the idea.
Way too many one-liners in both movies...might as well quote the whole things... ;)
they found me, I dont know how but they found me.
Doc, back to the future
I think my sig covers one of my favorites...
"Strange women, lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power is derived from a mandate from the masses, not from some farsical aquatic ceremony."
Also
"God is just a kid with a magnifying glass, and he's not planning anything"
"**** it Dude, let's go bowling."
"This is not Vietnam, there are rules."
Not a movie, but best quote EVER!!!
Young Peter Griffin: Why did all the dinosaurs die?
Museum Tour Guide: Because you touch yourself at night.
Colonel Sandurz: They must have a hyperjets on that thing!
Dark Helmet: Well what do we have on this thing? A Cuisinart?!?
Colonel Sandurz: No, sir! (over intercom) Prepare ship for light speed!
Dark Helmet: No, no, no, light speed is too slow!
Colonel Sandurz: Light speed, too slow?
Dark Helmet: Yes, we're gonna have to go right to ludicrous speed!
Colonel Sandurz: (nervous) Ludicrous speed, sir?
Dark Helmet: What's the matter, Colonel Sandurz? Chicken?
anyone ever seen airplane?
Guy: I'm leaving tomorrow. Our crew is flying in from the north under the radar. We're going to bomb their storehouses.
Girl: When will you be back?
Guy: That's classified information.
Once upon a time in Mexico
Look i have no eyes F**kmook
Monty Pythons Quest for the Holy Grail
Look you silly you have no arms.
YellowBeard
I dont have fruit down there woman!! i have lice and im proud of em
Sealab 2021
Im gonna lay down back because our concussion have me sleepy
Not a movie (a lot of us seem to be saying that)
Trailer Park Boys: Ricky could keep us in quotes for days.
"some accidents are going to happen whether you're drinking and on drugs or not"
"What comes around is all around."
"I'm sick of people saying that Julien is smart and I'm stupid. Julien's just smart at things like explaining things and getting people to do stuff, and I'm smart at playing hockey and shovelling snow."
"Get two birds stoned at once"
And one for Lahey
"Ricky started out as a little sh** spark from the old sh** flame. Then he turned into a sh** bonfire, the driven by the winds of his monumental ignorance he turned into a raging sh**fire storm. When I'm back as trailer park supervisor I can unleash a sh**nami tidal wave that'll engluf Ricky and extinguish his little sh** flames forever. And hopefully, he'll drown in the undersh** of that wave. Sh** waves."
Oh . This thread could keep me busy for weeks. I'll shorten my response to a few simple must see movies/shows for one liners.
Family guy (duh!)
Super Troopers
Waiting
Pulp Fiction
40 y/o virgin, Check out the extras, there are some gems in there.
SeaLab 2021: "It's like a koala bear ped a rainbow in my brain."
Comedy Central roast of Pam Anderson: (to Andy Dick from some lady roaster) "Andy's the only guy I know who can tell you the flavor of a popsicle just by sitting on it"
I forgot about that one, god sealab has a ass load of good quotes just like this one
(Talking about Captin Murphys happycake oven)
it's not a toy. it makes REAL cupcakes, with a 40-watt bulb, and There's icing packets. but The secret ingredient is love...it!
Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Family Guy
Futurama
Red Vs. Blue(redvsblue.com)
PANICS(redvsblue.com)
Robot Chicken
Team America
South Park
Mind of Mencia
The Colbert Report
"You know how I know your gay, you like Asia"
Oh, there are so so many. Here's one that rings all too true.
"They f^@$ you at the drive through, okay, they know you're going to be miles away before you realized you got f^@$ed"
Lethal Weapon 2- Leo Getz played by Joe Pesci
Elwood: It's got a cop motor a 440 cubic inch plant. It's got cop shocks, cop tires, cop suspension. It's a model made before catalitic converters so it'll run good on regular gas. So what do ya say is it the new Bluesmobile or what?
Jake: Fix the cigarett lighter.
Blues Brothers